According to the Arizona-based Elysian Fields Foundation (EFF) Kale provides a natural cure for addiction. Incredibly, the UK government went so far as to prepare a programme of public information bulletins exhorting mass Kale production and the introduction of Kale stew in primary schools. Ongoing research concluded, however, that claims Kale can cure addiction are false. The EFF, however, maintains that by continually chewing Kale an addict can avoid putting anything else in their mouth. They accept, however, that other ‘non-oral’ forms of addiction, such as shopping or certain forms of sexual behaviour, might not be resolved by eating kale. We encourage our readers not to believe any of it. Having eaten a substantial amount of kale those among us who call ourselves addicts remain un-cured.
Kale (2014, Fad)
The Delusionals 